Weekly Blog Post: La Fin

     This is my last blog post and I'd like to say that blogs have been my escape. I've learned that I'm the kind of reader who's not afraid of getting lost in a book, or in a blog post. I find that I lead a very problematic life and the only way to cope with that is to learn about other people and their problems. Books are my paradise.

     When I started to write blog posts, I hated them. Downright hated them. They were just another thing I had to deal with. But as I started to do them, I realized that these blog posts were... fun. They made me really feel the books that I had wrote about. Then it was getting clear that what I liked about books were the themes, and that's what I liked to write about. Blog posts made me see that books had an inside to them; themes, emotions, and it all required understanding to really comprehend these "insides" of books. And so every week, I read my books while trying to understand different emotions and views. This was a great benefit of writing blog posts; I tried to understand these views and emotions so I would write about them on my blog. My blog motivated me to really search for more in the books that I read.

     I started to love writing on my blog. It wasn't a hassle, but a hobby for me. It was so more refreshing to write on a blog than to write an one-page entry in my notebook on God-knows-what. Writing on notebooks made me feel like I was limited to only my class and my teacher seeing it. Writing online made me feel free, like there were no restrictions. Anyone could see it, anyone could comment on it, and anyone could share it with just a click of a computer mouse. Again, big benefit. When I'm writing in a notebook, it feels like I can't write every single thing I want to. My blog is my blog and I can do anything I want with it. Now, I know that's practically the same thing with my notebook, but a notebook is just so academic. Like if I write something out of the box in my notebook, it just seems so wrong. Almost like my opinions don't matter, and only factual statements do. I control my blog and I'm not afraid to put what I think on it.

     How many times have I seen someone try to make themselves seem interesting online? More than you think. But, it's not like I've never seen a more real person online than in real life. Some people envisage themselves as a person with more privileges online than in real life. You can write something knowing that someone will see it. You can write your feelings knowing someone will see it. I feel like I can express myself better online than in real life. I mean, who's really going to listen about your "feelings" in middle school? Our society is a cruel, harsh place, and sometimes I feel safer online than in real life. And then come the people who pretend to be something they're not. Don't get me, wrong I have nothing against them. In fact, I used to do it all the time online. I understand that people want to come on as nice and interesting, not shy and boring. So, really, everybody's different on the Web. People express themselves in different ways.

     I feel like every website's freedom is somewhat abused. Especially Face-book's freedom. People get mean sometimes and it can get serious, and sometimes, it can only happen online. Teenagers do abuse the freedom of websites and they can do it by just calling people names. You can't say it to someone's face? Oh, no, don't worry. You can insult people anonymously by using Form-spring! People take advantage of these privileges. It's a horrible thing and it can scar people, emotionally and mentally.Also, I'd like to say that not everyone has the courage to say what they want to say, so maybe saying something online could be an opportunity for them to say it. Not everyone has the guts to say something in real life, so I feel like the Web really opens more options to everyone.

     I can honestly imagine myself keeping this blog up for the rest of my life. Just not weekly. Or daily. If I do keep it, it wouldn't be about books anymore. It would be mainly about life and maybe even philosophy. As a side note, I would like to add that I am not creating a new blog under any circumstances. I feel too committed to this one already. These blogs are great, really. They're such a nice way to carry out any feelings you have about... anything! I'll be sure to catch up with my blog in the future. This is my 36th and last (or maybe not) blog post. Annie out.

     Oh, I forgot! When I was going through my "quote" phase, I swore to myself that I would remember to put this great quote by Eleanor Roosevelt:
     "If life were predictable it would cease to be life, and be without flavor."
      This quote reminds me of this whole year and everything's that happened. This quote also pertains to my blog; I never know when I'll check with it or maybe even change it. My blog is like my life (although not all of it), and it will always be unpredictable.

Weekly Blog Post: The Truth About Forever

The Truth About Forever by Sarah Dessen

     I've always loved Sarah Dessen books and I've got to say, this book is the best out of all of them.  This book truly touches your heart while giving you a glimpse of what's really life. This book will connect with your mind and soul whilst bringing you a place so familiar, you could call it home. I love this book because of it's balance between love and friendship. Everything is laid out perfectly in this book and page after page, you'll realize that you were caught up in the midst of these carefully laid out emotions. Stunning details and a glorious story that will shine right through you. So let us travel aboard a story that will touch your heart. Here, there is nothing but bits of friendship, being heard, opening up, moving on, and why even, trying to be perfect.

     I honestly can't imagine how my life would be without friends, even the bad friends. My idea of a friend is someone you can lean on, but someone that can on lean you as well. Macy, the main character, is the girl who has never really had a real friend and I can see that she wants one- badly. My past isn't pretty, and neither is Macy's. I've never had real friends who liked me for who I was, and I never cared since hey, at least I had friends, but that is definitely not the case. This book has taught me that we all deserve someone in our lives that makes us feel special. It can't always be us trying to improve people that won't even glance our way more than once. I love how Macy basically symbolizes every one of us that can't seem to find a real friendship.Macy seems to adapt to her new friends faster than she had when she met her old friends. Isn't that a sign already that friends are supposed to make you feel good and that they're not here to make you feel lower than them? Nobody's perfect, much less friends, but we can all strive to always be there for each other. But when you think about it philosophically, nothing is real, nothing is true. We can only try to make the best of what we can; it's what being friends about.

     Being heard; the skill I've never learned to accommodate. I have never, ever, had a loud enough voice to make people listen. And when people did listen, they would think that my words didn't really matter. I've rarely chosen to say something, so I'm rarely heard. Trust me, I know how it feels like to want to tell someone something, but actually end up withdrawing. I can tell Macy has the same problem too: she's afraid someone will really listen, but not understand. She's afraid of breaking out of her shell. That's another part of Macy's problem: she's scared that people would think of her differently if she was to speak what was on her mind. She's controlled by other people's thoughts, not her own. She wants to seem the most normal human being alive. But truth is, there is no normal. We're all us. I was grown up to believe everyone was different and that's how I see things. If no two humans are alike, then how come ''most of us'' are being classified as normal? Normal is a word that isn't to describe society. Normal is not real and it will never be obtained.

     Opening up is yes, another problem. Recently, I've learned that opening up is not just a way of expressing yourself, but a way of telling what you've been hiding. I like opening up, but I almost always draw back into the dark without saying a word. Macy is the same and it's almost comforting to have someone like her to be experiencing the same problems I am. Macy lets others tell her what to say and again, they basically controls her. She has no grasp on her own life. Morally, she knows what is right; she just doesn't care which side she takes: bad or good. She doesn't even know who she is and so she thinks that she can't tell about her secrets and holes inside of her. Of course, it's her choice, but opening up just can't be done for her. But as I continue this story, I learn that opening up is more like a transition rather than a decision.

     The sequel to opening up is of course, moving on. Everyone can move on, everyone actually does, in the logical sense. We all forget sooner or later and it's definitely not a transition nor is it a decision. It's something your body does continuously. But the majority of use just chooses to not move on, but rather drown themselves in something we call grief and sorrow. I've learned to have low expectations; things don't always go as planned. I feel as if that actually makes it feel less hard to move on with that kind of thinking. I discover that Macy not like that, but she thinks in a way that moving on is like an obstacle almost nobody can achieve. I believe that moving on is something we do on free will, not something we can control. Even as you're sitting around and moping, it's just a cycle of moving on. Moving on is something that gets us from one thing to the other. Moving on is a way of life.

     The one major thing that makes me worry about Macy is that she lives to be perfect. She thinks that being perfect can erase all of her past and mistakes. Surprisingly, I have once thought that too. I thought that being perfect could put me in a better position. Here's a line I'm going to steal from Macy:
   
     ''It takes a lot of work to be perfect. If you didn't want to break a sweat, there was no point in even bothering.''

     She believes in being perfect and it's even sometimes scary how far she would take it. In reality, there is no perfect. Perfect is just as obtainable as normal is. Everyone makes a mistake or maybe even some sort of a mistake, so seeking perfectness is not only waste of time, but it proves that you're oblivious to the real world. I had once sought perfection and found nothing, but emptiness. Perfection, like the word normal, is not a word to describe humans, but something that will never be revealed. Philosophically, there is no perfection. We all live as humans who can be clumsy and unreadable. Even God's existence is flawed; there is no way of knowing the truth about Him and maybe it's already a mistake to believe in him. Guess Bokononism (the belief that all religions are fake) can be applied.

     So, again, this book is really heart touching and warm. You don't have to open up to it, this book will open up to you. This book is powerful and such a book deserves more audience. Open it and experience what I did and you'll feel a strong pull to all the characters, including Macy, in this book.